LIFE COACH JENNA

Coaching Moment:

Your choices are powerful. The most important thing you possess is the ability to decide or to choose. When we realize we are as far in life our own choices have brought us, we take greater ownership for our life and our choices.
What does it mean to say “I am living my best life”? How well I am doing with my choices? What changes do I need to make …
Physically
Financially
Mentally/Emotionally
Relationally
Spiritually
According to Dr. Marilee Adams, we have two paths in our choices. We can go down a “judger” path or choose the “learner” path. When I deal with people do I have a “judger mindset” or a “learner mindset”?

Judger:

Quick to react, judge, criticize, debate, win-lose.

Learner:

Values not knowing, learning, considers perspective of others, questions assumptions.

Top 12 Questions to Consider When Making A Decision

01 – What do I want?
02 – What are my choices?
03 – What assumptions am I making?
04 – What am I responsible for?
05 – How else can I think about this?
06 – What is the other person thinking, feeling, needing, and wanting?
07 – What am I missing or avoiding?
08 – What can I learn here?
09 – What questions should I ask myself and/or others?
10 – What action steps make the most sense?
11 – How can I turn this into a win-win?
12 – What is possible?

Coaching Moment:

Now that you have an idea of changes that need to take place, remember the “One-Degree” principle in your homework. The principle is taking one area that needs to change and making small, incremental changes. Choose some small changes you are willing to make in the next thirty days.

My small, “One-Degree”, change in the next 30 days:
Pick one or more areas…..
Physical
Mental/Emotional
Financial
Relational
Spiritual

Tell your Story: Who are you?

“Mirror, Mirror on the Wall.” When you look in the mirror who do you see?
1. Other people are smarter or more gifted than I am.
2. I really don’t like who I am.
3. If I were to really be myself, no one would like me.
4. I have the need to be liked by everybody.
5. If it’s not done perfectly, then I don’t feel good about myself.
6. If I were to die tomorrow, nobody would care or really miss me.
7. Many days I don’t feel very important or significant.
8. I feel useless and worthless.
9. I really don’t like myself.
10. Probably won’t be successful or succeed in life, so why try?

*Score Results:

If you scored 38-50, you have a very healthy self-view.
If you scored 26-37, you could use help with self-view.
If you scored 10-25, you have serious self-view issues.

LOOKING INTO GOD’S MIRROR

ARE YOU VALUABLE?

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”
- Genesis 1:27

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”
- Psalm 139:14

“For we are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for use to do.”
- Ephesians 2:1

ARE YOU LOVED?

“As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you, now remain in my love.”
- John 15:9

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with Lovingkindness.”
- Jeremiah 31:3

“For God so loved the world that He gave his only Son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”
- John 3:17

“How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God”!
- 1 John 3:1

ARE YOU COMPLETE?

“For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and you have been given fullness in Christ, who is the head over every power and authority.”
- Colossians 2:9

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.”
- 2 Peter 1:3

ARE YOU SECURE?

“He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.”
- Proverbs 14:26

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.”
- Romans 8:1-2

“I am born of God and the evil on cannot touch me.”
- 1 John 5:18

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”
- Jeremiah 29:11

ARE YOU FORGIVEN?

“But with you there is forgiveness.”
- Psalm 130:4

“Therefore my brothers, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you.”
- Acts 13:38

“In him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sin in accordance with riches of God’s grace.”
- Ephesians 1:7

ARE YOU Confident?

“I am confident that God will complete the good work He started in me”.
- Philippians 1:6

“I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.”
- Philippians 4:13

“I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind.”
- 2 Timothy 1:7

“In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.”
- Ephesians 3:12

“We are more than conquerors through him who loved us.”
- Romans 8:37

What are three areas that you would like to see breakthrough happen?
What are three areas that you would like to see breakthrough happen?
What are three areas that you would like to see breakthrough happen?2
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Coaching Moment:

Our beliefs are what drive our behavior. You will never act outside of your beliefs, at least not for any length of time. Most of us do the things we do because of our core beliefs.

Here is how the progression works:

Beliefs ➜  Thoughts ➜  Emotions ➜ Behavior

  • People think, feel and act based upon what they believe.
  • Beliefs are the elements from which you create your reali
  • Who you believe you are, is who you are (through behavior).
  • You are the result of the ideas and beliefs you hold as true.
  • Your perceptions are learned and you can change them.
  • Lies are as powerful as the truth, if you believe them.

So, if you want to know why you do the things you do, a better question to ask is “what do you really believe?” At any given time, you can observe your behavior and work backwards. What am I feeling here? What kinds of thoughts are generating my emotions? What messages do I really believe?

Lie Categories People Believe

FEELING LIES

  • If I feel it, it must be true.
  • If I feel it, it must be real.

BIG PICTURE LIES

  • If it turns out okay, then why quibble over the errors along the way?
  • The destination is more important than the journe

PERFECTION LIES

  • I have to be perfect to feel good about myself.
  • If something isn’t perfect, why pursue it?

APPROVAL LIES

  • I must have everyone’s love and approval.
  • I need permission before and can do things.

VICTIM LIES

  • My unhappiness is someone else’s faul
  • My past predicts or restricts my future.
  • I am the way I am and cannot change.
  • Things never work out for me.

PERSONALIZATION LIES

  • I can’t be happy unless things go my wa
  • Things happen and I take them personall
  • It’s all about ME, MYSELF and I.

ENTITLEMENT LIES

  • People owe me for what I do for them.
  • Someone or something else should meet my needs.

PROSPERITY LIES

  • A person should have it all, no matter wha
  • You shouldn’t have to wait for what you wan PERFORMANCE LIES
  • My worth is determined by my deeds.
  • God’s love must be earned.

PAINLESS LIES

  • Life and God are always supposed to be fair.
  • Life is supposed to be relatively eas

PEOPLE LIES

  • People are basically good.
  • I don’t need other people to function in life.
  • I can judge a person by their appearance.

RELATIONSHIP LIES

  • Relationships should meet my emotional needs.
  • Relationship partners should be just like me.
  • If it requires work, then it isn’t meant to be.

SECURITY LIES

  • I need to be secure before I can take action.
  • I have been hurt, so I can never trust anyone.

PRESUMPTION LIES

  • I know exactly how this is going to turn o
  • People like that will always disappoint me.

RELIGIOUS LIES

  • All my problems are caused by my sins.
  • God protects me from all pain and suffering.
  • Some people are favored by God over others.
  • God doesn’t have time for my problems.
  • Clergy always has to go to God on my behalf.
  • A good Christian doesn’t get angry, anxious, or depressed.

PERCEPTION ERRORS

  • I tend to either over-generalize or exaggerate things.
  • I either magnify or minimize the importance of things.

Do you identify with any of these lies? What are some negative events that shaped your thinking? What were some negative things spoken or done to you? What life messages did you adopt or internalize? It’s important to be honest even if it’s painful.

Coaching Moment: The way to freedom is to replace the lie with the truth. Belief comes from hearing (Romans 10:17) a new life message (Gods’ Word). Truths I will begin to declare over my life. God’s Word declares that we are to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. (Romans 12:2) It’s a choice to replace the lies with the truth.

Harmful Belief Pattern

Truthful Belief Pattern

Coaching Moment:

Life is about choices and values. Our values reflect the things that matter the most to us. When we live our best life and our most authentic life, it is usually lived from our values. Our values are an important part of the decision process and really define who we are as people.

Values Exercises:

Think back to when you were a child from age 6 to 12. What were 5 to 10 qualities that were true of you? Don’t take a lot of time with this. Do it quickly.
List several characteristics of when you were at your best over the past two decades. In other words, you were living your best self out of your values.
What do you value? (This is not an exhaustive list- something to get you started.) Click the values that matter to you.

Summarize Core Values:

Now go back and think about your top five values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.
These are your core values. List your five top values.

Coaching Moment:

You can literally take your core values list and use them as a guide in your decision making process. Your values become a guide for what you say “yes” to and what you say “no” to. A life that is in sync is a life that makes decisions consistent with one’s core values.
How satisfied are you with your life currently? On a scale of 1 to 10; 1 being the least satisfied and 10 being the most satisfying. How would you rate each are of your life? Please rate your current level of satisfaction with each of the following areas of your life. Place a number from 1 to 10 in the box next to each item: a “1” score means “entirely unacceptable to me in its current state”, a “10” score means “I couldn’t be happier with this”. Enter “N/A” for any that do not apply. Although these areas will vary from time to time, please give your best overall assessment of how content or pleased you are with each one at this point in your life.
What are you tolerating and what is draining your energy?
Home: What is draining your energy? What do you need to de-clutter this area?
Home: What is draining your energy? What do you need to de-clutter this area?
Home: What is draining your energy? What do you need to de-clutter this area?
Home: What is draining your energy? What do you need to de-clutter this area?
Mental: What kind of negative thinking preoccupies your thoughts?
Mental: What kind of negative thinking preoccupies your thoughts?
Mental: What kind of negative thinking preoccupies your thoughts?
Mental: What kind of negative thinking preoccupies your thoughts?
Mental: What kind of negative thinking preoccupies your thoughts?
Emotional: What is robbing you of joy? What is zapping your energy?
Emotional: What is robbing you of joy? What is zapping your energy?
Emotional: What is robbing you of joy? What is zapping your energy?
Emotional: What is robbing you of joy? What is zapping your energy?
Emotional: What is robbing you of joy? What is zapping your energy?
Relational: What relationships are toxic to you and draining you of energy?
Relational: What relationships are toxic to you and draining you of energy?
Relational: What relationships are toxic to you and draining you of energy?
Relational: What relationships are toxic to you and draining you of energy?
Relational: What relationships are toxic to you and draining you of energy?
Spiritual: What is cluttering your walk with God? Lack of time? Anger or forgiveness issues?
Spiritual: What is cluttering your walk with God? Lack of time? Anger or forgiveness issues?
Spiritual: What is cluttering your walk with God? Lack of time? Anger or forgiveness issues?
Spiritual: What is cluttering your walk with God? Lack of time? Anger or forgiveness issues?
Spiritual: What is cluttering your walk with God? Lack of time? Anger or forgiveness issues?

NEEDS:

What about your needs? What are three of your most pressing needs right now?
What about your needs? What are three of your most pressing needs right now?
What about your needs? What are three of your most pressing needs right now?
What about your needs? What are three of your most pressing needs right now?
If you could make one change in one area, what would it be?

If you could pick one thing to experience some real change or movement in the next 30 days, what area of your life would that be? What would be your first small step if you were to think of a one degree change?

Actions Worksheet

Without a plan, we plan to fail. Without action, the plan will never happen.